Vilifying Voxilla’s Hometown

Enough already with the unwarranted attacks on Voxilla’s hometown.

They are coming by way of desperate politicians and their media mouthpieces who have settled on the vilifying phrase “San Francisco values” to instill ill-founded fear among voters in the redder parts of the US.

Their argument is obtuse and moronic. In campaign ads, political fundraising pitches, in the words of some newspaper editorials and out of the mouth of mean-spirited gas bags like Bill O’Reilly and Rush Limbaugh, the story is that if the Democrats win a majority of the seats in the House of Representatives, Nancy Pelosi (D-San Francisco), she of “San Francisco values,” becomes Speaker of the House.

Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, whose “values” allowed him to leave his hospital-bound cancer-stricken wife for a Congressional aide and then refuse to pay child support, asks in an email money pitch on behalf of Republicans “will everything you’ve worked so hard to accomplish be lost to the San Francisco values of would-be Speaker Nancy Pelosi?”

Current House Speaker Dennis Hastert, whose “values” apparently include ignoring former Congressman Mark Foley’s advances on underage pages lest a safe GOP seat be put at risk, asks “Do we really want Nancy Pelosi’s San Francisco values leading the culture war?”

What are “San Francisco values” anyway?

Editorial writers at the Augusta Chronicle in Georgia elaborate in an editorial by writing that, if Democrats gain a majority in the House, “Pelosi will be speaker and her far-left San Francisco values — gay marriage, cutting and running from Iraq, coddling terrorists, raising taxes, amnesty for illegals — will become the House agenda.”

I spit out my quad decaf latte all over my soy eggs benedict when I read this at the vegan espresso house this morning. Fortunately, Mohammed, who works and is appropriately coddled there, put down the molotov cocktail and rushed over to clean up the mess while uttering something about the infidels that had so offended my feminine side. I even made Sophia and Dylan, Frank and Tommy’s adopted kids from Somalia and Korea laugh. I was so embarrassed, I “cut and ran” out of there, but stopped long enough to sign a petition to increase my taxes by 200 percent on the way out. Then I drove my spinach-oil-guzzling hybrid over to the house paint store to remind the Spanish-speaking job-seekers there to vote — five, six times — on Tuesday.

OK, none of that happened. And it never would. Because, when all is said and done, San Francisco is not unlike most other American cities. Sure, most of us believe gays and lesbians should have the same rights as everybody and that a constitutional amendment on wedding ceremonies is unbelievably silly. But it seems to me that we’re right in line with the rest of the nation when it comes to the war in Iraq, terrorists, and taxes (we don’t like any of them).

It’s not my place to tell you how to vote (though it’s probably no secret how I will). But when you do vote (and you are going to vote, aren’t you?), don’t let “San Francisco values” sway you. The politicians and their media puppets attacking our hometown in their pre-election talking points are clueless.

San Francisco is a nice place, and our “values” are just fine. If you don’t agree, let’s discuss it over a Napa Cab and brie.


  1. rizsher says:

    Really would like to know what that rant had to do with VoIP?… except further propogating some really stupid stereotypes…Mohammaed with his Molotov cocktail…. infidelts… and offending some of us Muslims here, Mr. Marcelo, you have achieved precious little.

  2. marcelo says:

    I am very sorry you were offended.

    And I would also like to, in advance, apologize to Muslims, coffee drinkers, vegans, gay parents, adoptive parents, petition gatherers, hybrid drivers, voters, day laborers, Spanish speakers and any other group mentioned who did not interpret what I wrote as an attempt to satirize narrow-minded stereotypes, and not to propagate those stereotypes.

    Now I know how John Kerry must feel.

  3. PhoneBoy says:

    It doesn’t have to do with VoIP. It’s his Soapvox. 😉